Although quitting is not always bad, when we do quit on something important to us, it can affect us in many ways.
There will be occasions when quitting on our goals can be the best choice for us at the time, however we have to be mindful it doesn’t become a repetitive pattern.
Reasons Why We Quit
Whenever we quit, we’ll come up with reasons as to why we’ve done so, which in our minds, can be valid reasons. Here are some of the common reasons why we quit.
- Not seeing improvement or progress.
- Don’t know what to do to move forward towards something we want.
- Lack of discipline or motivation because we find ourselves struggling in some way.
- Don’t have adequate skills or knowledge to make progress.
- Lack of support or not having a peer group.
- Lack of confidence or high levels of self-doubt.
If we’re not aware of the reasons why we quit, we may be repeat our behaviours without consciously knowing we’re doing it.
Most people will spend more time planning a one-off event than they will planning their life or creating a life plan.
This may include a vacation, a wedding, a birthday or anniversary celebration. Occasionally people will set New Year’s resolutions but they are often short-lived.
Rarely do most people plan their life in any significant detail. This suggests that our priorities are mixed up.
While having a plan for our lives may not be necessary, having one compared to not having one, will give us greater clarity and a higher probability that we will achieve what we want, or at least, get closer to where we want to be.
It’s better to have an idea of where we are heading than to just drift along in life, hoping we’ll somehow get to a better destination.
Having a plan for our lives can be the our guiding post and help us make the right decisions to move us closer to where we want to be.
Our desire to do or have more in life often impacts our decisions and what we give our attention to.
The idea of really doing well or crushing it in life is very appealing, however, in order to have that experience consistently, we have to do things differently. Chances are, if we want something new, we’ll have to make new decisions and take new actions.
Some of the benefits of crushing it in life include:
- Feeling good mentally, emotionally and physically.
- Having a positive mental attitude.
- Supporting those who matter most to us better.
- Being an inspiration to others who also want to crush it in life.
- Having the confidence and courage to pursue our dreams.
In order to perform at a high level consistently and make the best of life, we make some changes, both big and small.
Dreams do come true! Our dreams are an extension of us so it’s our responsibility to do what’s necessary to make them a reality.
It doesn’t matter which stage of life we’re in or how old we are, there’s always things we can do to consistently keep moving forward towards our dreams.
In order for a dream to become a reality, we must have a dream to begin with. It shouldn’t matter how big or small we think our dream is. If it’s something that important to us, we should do all we can to make it come true.
As a young child, after seeing pictures and learning about the history of the Taj Mahal in India, seeing it in person became a dream of mine.
For many years, it was just a distant dream and I didn’t intentionally do anything to make it a reality.
Having a better life is something we all want. What we do daily is often driven by our desire to improve the quality of our lives.
Even though we want a better life, sometimes cultivating the right attitude or mindset to get the results we want can be difficult.
Our external environments and what we feed our minds often has a major effect on our mindset. If we predominantly give our minds positive, optimistic or uplifting input, we’ll tend to have a positive attitude.
If we are exposed to a lot of negativity, pessimism or discouraging input, it will:
- Lower our motivation to get things done on time.
- Affect our attitude daily.
- Place unnecessary stress on our relationships.
- Cause us to not dream big.
- Decrease our overall happiness and quality of life.
Being able to have a healthy mindset is critical in order to achieve the results we want and take responsibility for all aspects of our lives.
Being able to deal with, embrace and take advantage of change is vital if we want to design and live the life we want.
The rate at which things are changing is continuing to accelerate, which can generate feelings of discomfort and uncertainty.
Some of the common concerns that’s resulting in higher levels of uncertainty include:
- Will my skills or profession still be relevant in the future?
- Will I have a job or business in a year or two?
- Will I have enough money for my retirement?
- Will I be able to keep up with the changes in technology?
- Will I be able to support my family?
There are many other questions that can be added to the list above depending on our individual situation, however the common theme is change is bringing about a higher level of uncertainty about the future.
How we deal with change is dependant on our values, motivation and vision for the future we want to create.
Even though we’re all unique, we often find ourselves imitating others or trying to be someone we’re not.
The idea of being our true selves is of greater importance if we’re in any type of leadership role because our words, behaviours and actions will influence and impact others, either in a positive or negative way.
While it’s valuable to learn from others so that we can improve our leadership abilities, what will help make us stand out from other leaders, is our ability to be unique.
It’s important to remember that we should never pretend to be someone we’re not, but we can adopt qualities, traits or behaviours from leaders we admire and incorporate them into our leadership style, while staying true to who we are.
A number of years ago, I did some training work for a company, where I was part of a team of training consultants focused on introducing a new way of training employees. While the training methodology had been around for many years, it was a very new concept in the company.
The concept of taking risks implies there is a possibility something we want to accomplish may not work out.
Taking a risk means doing something for the first time or doing something different. There is often fear associated with taking risks and most times, the things we initially believed to be risky don’t turn out that way.
Risk is often overrated because things eventually work out, even in times of failure. We tend to learn and grow more from our failures than from our successes.
The level to which we’re willing to take risks often corresponds to the level of success or reward we get in life. Risk equals reward. The more risks we take, the better our chances of achieving what we want.
It’s quite normal to have some level of fear come up whenever we think of doing something we believe is risky. The good news is we can always do things to deal with any potential risks so that we can continue to make progress and move closer to what we want.
While taking risks in life means we’re learning and growing, it’s important to know that we should never put ourselves at risk. If we do something that affects our ability to survive or stay physically safe, then perhaps the risk we’re taking is not an intelligent risk.
Every risk has to be assessed on its own merit.
The words we use has a huge impact on how we feel and what we experience on a daily basis.
If we use more positive words, whether it’s in written form or spoken, we’ll tend to be more optimistic, cheerful and confident. On the other hand, if we use more negative words, we’ll tend to be more pessimistic, focused on what’s going wrong and not be as self-assured or self-confident as we’d like to be.
As a result of our early programming and the external environments we’re exposed to, most people know and use more negative words instead of positive words.
It’s a matter of perspective whether using positive words is better than using negative words and the context in which they’re used, however it’s useful to know the effect the words we use are having on us and those we interact with.
Certain words we use on a regular basis may be causing us to have low confidence, therefore it’s extremely valuable to know what they are so we can consciously choose to use more empowering words.
Many years ago in my manufacturing career, I had just started a new role as a site manager for a company. During the first two months, I was trying to find my feet and better understand the way things operated.
One of the great things about us is that we’re programmed for growth, which means we all want to be, do and have more in life.
In the book, The Science of Getting Rich, in the chapter on Increasing Life, Wallace Wattles writes, “Every living thing must continually seek for the enlargement of its life because life—in the mere act of living—must increase itself.”
There is a law of the universe which states that we’re either in a state of growth or decline. Put simply, if we’re not growing, meaning if we’re not actively seeking to be, do or have more in life, it means we’re dying.
For us, dying means accepting or creating the same reality over and over again, or not making progress in life. If we speak to a person, most times we’ll be able to tell if they’re growing as a person or whether they’re content to be where they are in life, which is just another way of saying they’re in a state of decline.
By achieving more, we’ll be able to:
- Experience or do more in life.
- Give more to others who are not as fortunate as us.
- Support others in achieving more.
- Make a bigger difference or impact in what we do.
This idea of either doing, having or wanting more is not greedy or selfish because it’s part of who we are. Knowing our intention behind wanting more is really important because that will identify whether we’re after personal gain or whether we’re focused on benefiting others as well.